As I approach the close of another year, another compartment of 365 days within which one is meant to reflect and assess their accomplishments and lessons learnt blahblah. My theory is that some rather wise nut invented the concept of a ‘year’ which would force us to be introspective rather than rolling through meaningless aimlessness. So to honor that person I have decided to compile a list of things I have learnt or realized in 2012:
1. You need to get screwed to get wiser. It’s what brings the balance between having faith in the world and being prepared to have that dagger shoved in your back.
2. You can go through periods of depression/self-loathing/drowning in tears and reduce yourself to pretty much nothing. You can have friends pulling you up , family holding your hand and still not move an inch. Only when you want to help yourself, will you stand up.
3. The above being said, it’s still pretty awesome when you have people you care still want to be there even when you’re a mess.
4. Regret sucks. It can eat you like cancer. There is a comfort in letting go and never looking back.
5. It’s okay to be lost and confused when it seems everyone around you has it all figured out. You have your own bar set for yourself and your own life to live. Perhaps confusion is better than lukewarm contentment. Or so I keep telling myself..
6. There are times when you will discover some indigestible truths about the people you love. And despite that cliched Mother Teresa quote about loving without judging, you will momentarily lapse and see them through a different light. But you have to decide to be the grown-up that you are and accept them, knowing that some things can’t be changed.
7. Sometimes not caring is the best medicine.
8. Feeling like shit shows on your face- in some way or the other. Be it a fake smile or crappy complexion.
9. If you love doing something that makes you feel free and happy- never ever stop doing it. Even if it looks/sounds/tastes bad to the rest of the world.
2012 has been a very confusing year for me. A bit of a struggle. A lot of disappointment, mostly in myself. Some surprises. But there have been some epiphanies and realizations that I owe to it which will hopefully help me in 2013 and the many more years to come.
So to quote one of my ever-inspiring bands U2:
“Who’s to say where the wind will take you, who’s to say what it is will break you
I don’t know, which way the wind will blow”
I have slightly changed the context..but nevertheless… it’s all in the wind…here’s to another fabulously nerve-crunching 365 days!